'Should I go to Paris?... Should I come back (home)? Should I stay here? Should I kill myself? Should I stop writing letters to you? You tell me what to do!' This passage was extracted from the book 'Chopin - Prince of the Romantics (by Adam Zamoyski), it is one of the letter's that the twenty-year-old Chopin sent to his friend Matuszynki.
He was meant to be one of the greatest masters of Romantic music, people like him make our mundanity glow in pitch black endless dark and just like (maybe you and quite like) me he was lost. The words of the young composer just gave me the free hand I needed to feel less pathetic. And my relationship with him has now changed forever.
That's what I like about biographies, they give you the chance to see yourself in others people's lives. Isn't it an overwhelming feeling the idea of holding in your hands the syntheses of someone's whole life? You can see the highlights of their existence, a hand full of their thoughts, a list of their affairs and their inevitable end. It makes me think what would be the highlights of my own life and all the things that are yet to happen. And it is such a great feeling! That's the excitement that only the unknown could bring.
I honestly find Life in the pages I touch and I believe that sometimes I'm so into it that people around me definitely think I should date someone or go to the psychologist. Nevertheless you know that when we are in love we feel things nobody can really understand and we can just feel sorry for them.
I, without a drop of shame, fall in love with books. And you can think that the trouble with that is that they don't love me back, but neither people do, so I'm quite used to it. And anyway is a not corresponded love less important than one that is? I honestly don't think so.
Tks for reading,
x B
Very well written.
ReplyDeleteIt's fascinating how no-one gave a shit about him when he was 20 and he came to play a very important part in the history of Music.
To think about that gives me the feeling that sometimes I might be having coffee with geniuses.
And at the same time, this kind of books give me the feeling that despite being so complex, with different values and beliefs, we're all after similar things. We feel the same. We suffer the same. And we all need to love something.
The truth is, we all need an obsession.
And we are all lost.
But the fun of it is that despite being all lost, we meet each other in the limbo and we exchange information, energy and love. And we carry on.
I worry for people who don't feel lost.
Feeling lost is the result of believing in a bigger meaning to life. It's not accepting the common. It's realising that if we were not to explore life, we would be wasting it. It's wanting more than most people think is enough. Feeling lost is being ambitious. It's demanding more from the Universe.
And what about judgements? Well, we can't blame people for having a money and family-focused life, but they can't blame us for wanting something more either..
And books might not love you back, but I do.
And I love you loooads! :)
ManahManahTchuTchuRururu